The App Developer's Wife

I can not tell you how many people thought we were lunatics when they found out that Josh had quit his job, our only source of income, AFTER we had gotten married. We didn't have a place of our own, and we couldn't afford a place of our own either. And we made an agreement with Josh's father that after we had gotten married, we would move out. When Josh sent his boss an email stating that he would be leaving in a couple of weeks, his boss offered him a promotion making almost $10,000 more a year and to work from home every other Friday. Josh considered taking him up on the offer and working for 6 more months to get rid of more debt. When he texted me back and forth from his desk asking "What do you think I should do?" I answered "I think you should quit."

This is the life of an App Developer's Wife.

Josh quit his job to pursue his dream of being a self employed app developer. He wanted to create something that people loved and would want on their iPhone, and he wanted to do it for money. His goal was to live off of what he created. I supported his dream, and I had faith in him and what I knew he could do.
    Josh inspired me when I first met him, and he continues to inspire me even now. And I've always believed that he could do something really outstanding. He's too smart to work for anyone else but himself, and he doesn't have a High School Diploma.
Yes. I told him to quit. Because we're too young to put our dreams on hold and pick them back up once we retire. There's too much beauty in the world to see. There's too many people we haven't met, encouraged, ministered to, laughed with, etc... There's too much life to be had to hang it on a hook to enjoy later. Plus he studied iOS Development for years! And here we were with a lump of money given to us from the wedding that we could easily live off of for a couple of months and pay off a chunk of our debt. It doesn't get any better than that. What we needed was time to learn, time to build, time away from distractions. So, Josh quit his 9 to 6 job, and we packed our stuff and moved out of his father's house, and ran away to Tennessee for a couple of months and stayed with Josh's mother and other siblings.

Josh buckled down and finished over 15 tutorial videos (some lasting an hour) over the 3 weeks. He looked at his old app that he had asked to take off of someone else's hands. iTextspeed. And decided to rebuild it, translate it into a more readable language (Swift), and make it easier to use. He decided to make an iTextSpeed 2.
And the nights have been long, and mornings were non-existent. I struggled to stay awake with him, as he typed away long past 2 in the morning. Josh's determination was made of steel.
I made a attempt to learn Swift and quite a few tutorials on Core graphics, UIDynamics, and other animations (because that's the part of coding that interests me, plus I love the math that's involved.) I am rather proud to say that I am the one that made the graph on the results page of iTextSpeed. And in the upcoming iTextSpeed 2, I made the speedometer that can be found on the results page. Yes, you've read that correctly, we haven't submitted iTextSpeed 2 yet. Our goal was for it to be out and in the App Store by the beginning of August... it is now August the 25th and down to our last week in Tennessee. We are tying loose ends, catching last minute bugs, and trying to learn marketing overnight. You have to be crazy to want to be an App Developer, but mind you, me and Josh are a couple of lunatics.

Since I know you guys must be curious by now to see who is this magnificent man I married, I invite you to take a look at him. He's rather adorable but over all, very inspirational. I'm excited to see what he does with his very own webpage especially when he writes the story of how he got a hold of iTextSpeed which I promise, IT'S WORTH READING!

The App Developer's Wife. She's a dame at home for sure. She's massaging her husband's shoulders when he gets stuck on a "Build Fail" issue. She's spreading butter over bread for him when he says he hasn't eaten anything yet. She wakes up in the middle of the night and notices that he's not in bed yet, and goes fishing for him in the dark.

Yes. Hello World. We are The App Developer's Wives.

Changed and Changing.

It is some time after New Year's Day, and these are the words that come to mind "Changed and changing". I am fully aware that I can not change the literary definition of these words, but the meaning of these words to me have...changed (for lack of a better word). They mean "I ran, and I am still running". "I am trained, but I am still training." I have distance behind me, but still a long way to go." Without a doubt, 2014 is a year I will not soon forget.

God is good. I've learned through experience that God does answer your prayers. I've also learned that some of God's greatest blessings come in the form of unanswered prayers. Right now, I could think of a few prayers I've made in the past that I'm grateful to God for not picking up and letting me go to voicemail. I'm grateful because at the time, I did not consider God's plan for me and was only concerned with what I wanted. 

   I've prayed for a certain situation to work out in my favor because the outcome was something I felt I wanted more than anything in the world. If God had made this come true for me, I would not be where I am today: engaged to a God loving man, striving together to understand God more, wanting to learn how to listen to God. My heart was not in the right place when God led me to Josh. It was intimidating at first to hear from him that he wanted God to be in the center of his life. At that instant, I thought "well, this isn't going to last..." And I didn't assume that because I did not believe that there was a God. I was raised Catholic and went to a Catholic Church, I participated in Lent, I was baptized as a child, and I did my first communion. I believed that there was a God, but I thought that my relationship with Josh would not last because I hardly read the bible, I prayed only when I needed something, and I didn't strive to be like Jesus. 

   What I've realized since then is that every relationship I've had before Josh was empty because it WAS NOT surrounding God. Now how do you like that? Lesson learned.
 Have you ever learned something new that changed you? Have you ever considered the fact that you can never unlearn something? That is what my 2014 year has been about. It's been about change. Over the past year God had me exercise my patience, understanding, faith, trust, and my love. There is no way that I can be the same. My relationships have meaning, the music I listen to has meaning, the days I've been unemployed sitting at home have more meaning! I now know what it means to sing to God "You are worthy of all praise..."God is Lord of all! Yes, I've heard it before, but I feel it now written in heart the God is Lord of all! Praise be to God! And to His son, Jesus Christ! He is the master of time and space and holds the entire solar system in His hands, and yet He listens to our simplest prayers like "Oh Lord, please let Josh make the bus!"
   Like I've said before, I am changed, but not done changing. I no longer want who I was. No longer do I want to hold myself back because of what I think of myself, instead, I want to focus on who God says I am.

God bless.

Dream Routine

Man, I want to be productive. Honest!

I want my handiwork to be seen throughout our rooms; beds made, clothes picked up, sparkling bathroom...etc. I want to keep things spic-n'-span just how my fiancé likes it, but in reality, I'm no Cinderella.

My day starts around 7:00 in the morning...after staying up till 12:00 AM the night before. I'm supposed to get up, wash up, and start on making Josh's lunch. Since I am addicted to late night mobile internet browsing, I've set a special alarm to go off at 7:10 called "Wake up and get it together." (Whatever "it" may be.) Being a serious slowpoke in the morning, I give myself 15 minutes before Josh wakes up because he has the ability to get cleaned up and dressed in 20 minutes or less; the amount of time it takes me to rub my eyes and wake up. In 15 minutes, I can wash my face, brush my teeth, and pat down my hair, but don't let that deceive you into thinking I'm ready to run out of the house. No sir.

Once I have his lunch ready and hanging on the door, I fix him a quick breakfast and feed it to him while he puts on his shoes. By this time, I am awake...at that instant, I feel very accomplished. It's one of the very few moments of my day where my timing must be spot on. Because once he has tied his shoes, he shoots right into the bathroom, then launches himself out of the house with time for quick peck on the lips as I walk him to the door. I lock it behind him thinking "He's fed. He has food for later. I helped make this happen. Wow! I'm good."

The rest of the day is spent watching Netflix, eating, working on the blog, checking out whatever sparks my curiosity, fighting to stay awake, take a nap, and washing loads of laundry that don't get folded. I feel so guilty when Josh comes home to a messy room with glasses everywhere. He's so patient and sweet; he simply takes them to the kitchen sink, and asks about my day...which makes me even more upset with myself. I feel like my whole had has went by, and I've been a bump on a log for the past 12 hours. Am I the only stay-at-home-dame guilty of this?

But I want to be productive. Honest!

I want to spend my days sewing, cleaning, cooking, baking, ironing, doing laundry, learning, writing, drawing, gardening, and whatever else perfect housewives do! I wanna be a Proverbs 31 woman (Oh boy, I went there.), because she is the perfect wife. She gets up early and works all day and night (Prov. 31:15-18). Her husband has nothing to worry about when it comes to his wife's reliability (Prov. 31:11-12). And she takes care of multiple tasks like preparing food, buying land, and making money! A woman like that gets her strength from The Almighty God. Her power comes from within her heart, because whatever the task at hand, she does it with love, and God is love.

It's funny, because I am realizing this as I'm writing. That a wife is able to run her daily routine because of the passion she has for making her husband happy...well of course if she has a passion for a clean house, that helps too I guess. Right now, I'm feeling that God would like me to ask Him for strength to carryout the day, because I really can't do anything without him. Like...right when I wake up before I set foot out of bed. I probably should start then, huh?

If, by any chance, you have similar feelings through out your day, I have one trick that kind of helps me to be productive in the day while Josh is at work. I create a to-do list, but not a real long one or else it becomes overwhelming. Just about 7-8 MAX duties to fulfill...and some duties are easy so I may feel accomplished as I check them off my list! I list things I realize need to be done from the day before or things that Josh may have mentioned like straightening out our bedrooms, clean the toilet, wash bedsheets, bake something sweet...etc. But the most important task I have on my list is "make special time for God," which is basically me trying to have a conversation with the Heavenly Father. I've learned the hard way that in order to maintain a healthy relationship, it requires communication. You can not expect to be peas and carrots with a friend that you only speak to when you are in need of something. Sad but true, and because this is true, I try to make time to talk to God at least once a day. To tell Him that I love Him, and why I love Him, and to thank Him for another day with those that I love. It may not seem like much, but this is all it takes to change the rest of my day. I become more pleasant and delightful, my spirit feels light, and my heart aches a bit as though I am in love. I'm happy because I feel God's delight in me as His daughter.

This is my invite to you: WHOEVER is reading this article. Leave a comment on your daily routine. What time do you start your day? What do you have to do in order to keep your boat afloat? What do you want to change, if anything? How do you like to spend your special time with God?

God Bless, friends, and stay passionate.

Deep Dame Drama: Disappointment

 

I haven't made much scholarly accomplishments. My one documented accomplishment, my diploma, has been in an envelope and stuffed into a night table's drawer for about 5 or 6 years. To be honest, I've kicked myself in the butt about it in the past, but not anymore.

I've learned that the only accomplishments that matter start with the goals we set for ourselves and not from what others set for us. (Doesn't that make a nice fortune cookie?) Now, keep in mind that all I have done, all I am able to do, and all I will do in this life is all because of God and the goals and passions that He's programed me with. Whatever I hold pride in, I owe to my Heavenly Father, period. I say this because I believe that everything that happens to me is within God's say-so. My suffering, my frustration, my lack of patience... God is not only giving me an opportunity to demonstrate His love, but also He's shaping me into the woman He knows I can be, and to be frank, I've got quite a bit more of molding to do.

 

The will of our God is more important than any other task a loved one could put upon you. This goal that God has for us is written deep within our hearts.  His will can not be found in the latest hip-hop-hit from MTV. His will is surely not in this month's issue of Vogue. In other words, His will is not the most popular thing to do. How swell does today's media make out Christianity to be? Is modesty in today's fashion? Have you seen any magazine cover lines saying "The fulfillment of abstinence, see page 32..."? Isn't it quite the opposite? Reverend Pat Fiordelise, from Virginia Christian Alliance, explains that "God's standard doesn't change just because American pop culture becomes more and more tolerant of sinful behaviors." 

 

So, what does this have to do with the "Disappointment" topic?

 

Simple

 

When God has written His mission for you in your heart, He gives you a burning desire for it. This desire that He gave to you may not always be understood by the people who are closest to us. They may call you crazy, a stiff, a wuss etc... They may say that they "know what's best for you". They may try to prevent us from "ruining" our lives, but in the end, our loved ones are looking out for us, so we must exercise our patience. 

    Following the dream that God has given to you will always be an uphill battle, but you are always destined for victory when doing the Lord's work in one way or another. Doing what's right is not always easy, and usually takes extra effort. And so, because we choose not to heed the guidance of our loved ones, the relationship we have with them tears a little at the seams. It is to be expected, but all the same, do not be discouraged. Do you believe that the same God that has created the universe and all living things cannot mend a broken relationship between you and a loved one? Who do you think taught Dr. Phil all he knows? 

 

Live the life that God has given to you. Fulfill the dreams and goals that are written in your heart before you begin to pester your children with dreams that are not meant for them, because then it would become a vicious cycle. Most importantly, do not be afraid of disappointing your loved ones when you answer your call from God, because He  will take care of you. You can't make everyone happy...but let's try not disappointing the master of all the universe, okay?

 

Fiordelise, Reverend Pat. Christian Is Not Cool. Virginia Christian Alliance, 2013. Web. December 3,  2014.

What are stay at home dames?

Have you downloaded a dictionary application to your phone yet? It's really all the rage. 

Anyway, searching for a definition of the word "dame" led me to a few meanings, but allow me to list a couple that stood out to me.

1. "(formerly) a form of address to any woman of rank or authority."

And

2. "Slang: Sometimes Offensive. a term used to refer to a woman: Some dame cut me off and almost caused an accident."

Why did they have to use the "woman driver" stereotype for the sentence example? Ugh.

Mind you, these are just the two most common definitions used in America. Apparently, in Great Britain, the title "dame" is given to a woman who is part of the Order of the British Empire, which stands about the same rank as a KNIGHT (No big deal, right?). Or the title dame is given to the wife of a knight (thats a real good dame you got there, Sir Lancelot).

    
Why would the word "dame", a word meant for royalty and female superiority, be turned into a term used towards woman in a negative gesture? Who's idea is it anyway?

Back in the day (a day that landed in the 1930's), a women (also known as a dame) was expected to take care of the house, take care of the children, and be a good wife. In the year 1939, things changed. The men  were drafted into the war, and women at home had to step up and basically take the men's place. Women were involved in serious manual labor. These women took up jobs doing welding, riveting, and worked in shipyards. The government encouraged women to take up more "war jobs" as well as "civilian jobs" through magazine articles and television ads.

I am a stay at home dame. Well, that's what I'd like my title to be.

My fiancé is my provider and I'm his chubby Guinevere. He goes out and slays clients' technical issues, attends meetings at the round table in the Camelot conference room, and comes home to me around 7 p.m. He's my knight in ironed business wear. I cook him dinner and clean up around the house, and quite frankly, I'm happy with that. And once we get hitched, I'll be the woman of my own house. 

The Woman of the House. It's got a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Almost like a role a woman plays, or a responsibility she takes up, or a "rank of authority" almost. Let's give her a title. Let's give her a rank. She's been the significant other, the girlfriend, the right one, the fiancé, and the loving wife, so let's call her a dame. And once a month we'll call her the damsel in distress.

Stay at home dames are stay at home wives, mothers, fiancés even. We're trying to manage a household, and turn a house into a home. (Homemaker) We build our men up when life beats them down. We are the partners that God assigned the men because they can't run the world by themselves. It's safe to say that we've earned our title.

Pictures:
A Knight and His Lady by William G. Mackenzie

Rosie the Riveter from The Saturday Evening Post. May 29, 1943